Relationship Status: In a relationship
I just finished and graduated from my undergraduate program, I majored in International Business, and now I have two job offers, one as a business developer for a luxury brand in Paris and the other for a furniture design brand in Seattle. I need to make a choice, both jobs are attractive but I don’t know what to do.
POI: None
Specific Question: Can you help me make a decision? Should I choose a more successful job or stay in my hometown of Los Angeles and start my own business? -J.
It’s coming off strongly in the reading that before you make your decision, it will help if you take a step back a bit (even just for one day) before you think about your job decisions. I know you are required to make a choice soon, but there’s a very strong message about how it’s going to be important for you to take a small vacation away from this decision just a bit first, before you consider these choices.
The main reason being that all of these options you listed will have some kind of sacrifice the other doesn’t have, and that your current perspective actually is blocking you from some other opportunities, as well as being able to handle the current ones better.
All of the choices you listed are going to be important for your journey, but each has their own burdens, but one thing they all have in common is about your relationship with your boyfriend.
It seems if you take the path of staying in Los Angelos and start your own business, you will at first be emotionally fulfilled and inspired—and it feels meaningful—but I can see later down the road you have great chances of overburdening yourself and it’s mostly due to the your current perspectives that can slowly lead to eventual stress and a downward spiral. I see you successful in this path first, but with the current angle you have, later down the road, you’re likely to face unexpected financial problems that makes this quite unsustainable. Things can get better if you remember to take a break, but you may still have to take another path later on if you immediately choose this path in the beginning.
If you take the Paris job for a luxury brand, of course you will be financially stable in a much better way at first, but I am seeing issues with your boyfriend as you will actually get into a partnership with another man at the workplace there. The partnership is even quite positive and you may have feelings for him, and it can lead to some complications with your boyfriend. Not only this, but also I see the guy has a strong personality that can actually manipulate and hurt you later on. The other issue with this path is that it actually is quite empty on a soul level—the job is attractive on the outside, sure, but it’s a workplace and industry where you will have co-workers who care all about the outside. Working there for quite a time may slowly rub it in you and disconnect you for yourself, even if at first it is like a lady’s dream job and has high pay.
The furniture design brand in Seattle doesn’t pay as well as the Paris one, but it is still good pay. However, the challenges in here seem to involve co-workers and social situations that are quite unfair, and you may slowly over time fail in this job. Like I am seeing there are high chances you won’t get to stay in the job due to some kind of human relationships drama that is likely to happen later down the road, which is also going to negatively affect your relationship with your boyfriend. I’m not seeing a much bright future here.
All three paths come with its challenges, and it’s up to you to decide which path you want to experience growth on, but the reading is strongly showing me the need to take a step back from all three decisions a bit, and try to think about things from other angles you may have not considered… because it seems that if you do, you’ll more easily see another opportunity that will be more suited for you. All the paths will also affect your relationship with your boyfriend, but if you stay in Los Angelos and closer to him, you may not be as successful later down the road (even though at first you would).
So now you know what is likely to happen down each path, it “doesn’t matter” what you choose as long as you get your perspective in place and take a step back from your current perspective. But the more suited path seems to be a path that has yet to reveal itself if you could think about your situation from another angle.
I’m hearing “enjoy the experience,” and it’s important to remember that whichever path you choose, it is all going to still lead you to the right path. It’s up to you which challenge you want to experience, and the sacrifices are necessary at this time of your life. It helps to also communicate with your boyfriend what to expect in advance.
In regards to a direct decision, I keep hearing “deal with it later” and how it’s important to develop your own confidence and not be so actively busy with what’s likely to happen. And you can help boost your confidence by giving yourself time to rest more. Now is a great time to rest yourself before your new life; do what you can to take your mind off this stressful decision a bit, and you will better see a fourth solution that you can mix and match with one of the three choices you listed—the rest of the decision will be up to you.
~Kiyasu, www.kiyasugreen.com